♥

THIS IS SO DAMN SWEET ♥

Saving forever.

 Glee - Saving All My Love for You

It's not very easy, living alone
My friends try and tell me, find a man of my own
But each time I try, I just break down and cry
Cause I'd rather be home feeling blue So I'm saving all my love for you 

Deep shit.

Once in a while if we finished our hearing early, Mr.K will take me for a quick bite before heading back to office. 1 day while having our brunch he asked me what book am I currently reading and I said he doesn’t want to know because I read chick flick novels and not those serious materials like other my age would read. Then he told me he’s reading ‘God’s Dilemma’, because he is in search what is and who the real God is. He said he keep looking for the answer of what is the purpose of him being born, why does God wants him to be on this earth, why is he doing and not that, why would people want to get married when at the end of the day we will end up die alone, and etc. Further he questioned, if God is fair and great why are some people are rich and some can’t even afford to have propel meal once a day? Why are there people born with disabilities? Why are people fighting and wars taking place all around the world? Why must people think their religion is better than the other? Why the society judge people according to who does the most deeds publicly? Why this and why that?

I can’t even freaking enjoy my capati that day. Somehow when he raised this issue, he pretty much reminds me to Dr.MZ (coincidently he knows Dr.MZ because he was a visiting lecturer for his class in UM few years back) lol.what a small world since now Miss Sik is his Master class lecturer for IP. Ok back to the story...

For a second there I thought we were having a clash of minds (debate would sounds so exaggerate since we were at a Mamak restaurant,haha) comparing all the religions and stuffs beyond our imagination and most of the time my answers or the way I reciprocated sounds like as if I know what am I doing in this world but the truth is I just want to balance the conversation by being the positive party here and I told him, ‘I ain’t no the perfect Muslim but I never stop learning, you tend to over thinking about things K(since he asked me to stop calling him Mr.K kononnya nampak tua since he’s just 29y.o), for me as long as I’m happy doing what am I doing, happy with the way I am surrounded by the people I love I won’t wasting time thinking about things which we can never find the perfect and certain answer because I’m that kind of person the more I think about these kind of things I will start to question my faith and I don’t like it’.

Then I asked him,’ Why do you go to temple, pray, and go to those talks about Hindu, etc but at the end of the day you still don’t have the peacefulness of mind that you should get?’ He replied, ‘Because I have to, we were told to do that since were kids so we grow up thinking that’s the right thing to do but I’m a deep shit because I still can’t find the answer what am I doing here. And before leaving I said,’ That’s the difference between us, yes I was taught by my parents to love and obey my religion and God but whatever I’m doing for Islam now is because I want to not because I have too and I believe that is why I am happy.’

In the car otw back, the whole journey he still talking about it but I trying hard not to take it seriously and again and again he reminds me ‘You better don’t start to over thinking like I do, because I don’t need another person to join me in this deep shit’. I was just laughing and said, ‘No, I won’t’.

Have some faith will you?

I am a proud labour! :)

When I was 16 I thought by 25 I will have everything, like seriously EVERYTHING such as a great career, a cool ride maybe a sport car or superbike, a beautiful house to live with my parents, but here I am 23 years old and reality is all of that dreams seems are still far away to be fulfilled. This year's labour day was my 1st as employee, although being a pupil is not considered as 'real work' but I do what other with REAL work does such as wakes up early, hating every ondays and counting days for Friday, go through the horrible traffic jam, the workload and stress, scolded by lawyers or clients, running here and there, chasing due date for works given, doing case research, etc so I can proudly say I work hard to earn my allowance. I believe I started to appreciate the value of money a bit more compare to the time when I was just a student getting allowance from my dad. But I also love spending them for people I love because its not worth the happiness earning so much if they are not with me to share it. On that note to all working class heroes out there, have a relax day and enjoy your day. Take care and until next working day, wee-hoo!

Sweet reminders.

The moon reminds me of...

♥Yuna - Terukir Di Bintang ♥

Yes or No?

You can seek the advice of others, surround yourself with trusted advisors. But in the end, the decision is always yours and yours alone. And when it's time to act and you're all alone with your back against the wall, the only voice that matters is the one in your head. The one telling you what you already knew. The one that's almost always right. How come I still don't have enough guts and courage to just go ahead and make that 1 decision, I guess I still need His guidance. InsyaAllah. Sooner or later I will have to choose 1 out of the 2 path.

Who knows it can be this hard?

Scared.

Demi Lovato has spoken my mind in her latest single 'Give Your Heart A Break'. That's how a gamophobia feels and thinks all the time. No one will understand but they are constantly judging us.

3 of us.

Every now and then we the 3 girls of SBR & Co will get a bamboo-ing session for any mistakes any of us did. That 1 day when all of us was just so quiet, stand still, keep staring at the ground and looking pale(ok, maybe it was just me) after giving correct but not complete answers for the question he asked, Mr.R suddenly said:-

Master R: All 3 of you angels, when shaking or nodding your head you must do like Indian since all 3 of you mix of Indian blood.Saiyidah, you are half Indian; Sarah you are Chindian; and Roxanne you are dark for a Chinese and your Godfather is an Indian (Mr.R himself!) so that makes you an Indian too.

Me: I just couldn't look into his eyes nor can I laugh no matter how witty or funny statements he made because I'm scared of him especially after hearing all the stories about how bad temper he was but Alhamdulillah until today I have never experienced it (hopefully that day will never come)

I love how the 3 of us are :)

In between office and Courts.

After 3 years,finally!I made it on the last night of Cuci-cuci The Musical Last Kopek!The most funny theater musical so far, lots of bloopers from the casts and its worth every penny :)

Got to entered the VIP's room and met the gorgeous Vanida Imran, and tell how stunning she is in person!And told the dashing Hans Isaac when and where we met twice before.But I look so fat not gonna post any pictures with them but still yayy xD

1st Future Music Festival in Malaysia, its actually an annual event around the world esp Australia.

Won this for Jumbo actually, I will forever imagine her face & her high pitch voice everytime Jessie J's Domino playing on air now.hehehe. So cute!

Yeah Rox & Sarah might be disappointed that Kylie Minogue was replaced by Girls Generation @ SNSD, Orianthi and Kellis but I sure made some guys damn happy with this F1 concert tickets, as their seats were exactly infront of the stage!


Contest addict on roll babeh!

Sheaffer the word.

Am so touched for this thoughtful and sweet gift at the end of my 3^rd month of chambering, thanks a lot Ayah! My 1^st set of SHEAFFER which engraved with my name, will use them once I become a lawyer soon, InsyaAllah. He who wait for me late at night just to eat dinner together, he who faced all the troubles to help me with my works although legal world isn’t his field, he who has to listen to all the whining about how stressful & tiring working life is (just imagine what our parents have gone through all these years to provide us the perfect life we are enjoying now), he who never give up on me and most importantly he who loves me unconditionally! Love my Ayah, who doesn’t right? I’ll always be daddy’s little girl :’)

Sometimes simple thing makes you feel so loved and blessed, physically and mentally tired, completely beaten up but this has now redeemed all of that.

Open up your heart :)

We won't find 'hidayah' unless we seek for it. Watching this kind of stories make you appreciate your faith even more, we are blessed to be born as Muslim but its no easy task to keep it protected especially from the evil voice within yourself and its even tougher to maintain and improve our Iman from day to day. May these videos light up some of us out there :)

Inspiring.

Wrong.

I've really tried to keep this feeling inside,but everyday feels like a war.I just need to be me and stop fighting my own feeling..............if only it is that easy. ♥







This is just wrong...but I'm just too weak to fight it!Still struggling...

Used

Somebody That I Used to Know - Walk off the Earth (Gotye - Cover)






Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
I told myself that you were right for me
But felt so lonely in your company
But that was love and it's an ache I still remember

You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness
Like resignation to the end
Always the end
So when we found that we could not make sense
Well you said that we would still be friends
But I'll admit that I was glad that it was over

But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened
And that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And that feels so rough
No you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records
And then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know

Now and then I think of all the times you screwed me over
But had me believing it was always something that I'd done
But I don't wanna live that way
Reading into every word you say
You said that you could let it go
And I wouldn't catch you hung up on somebody that you used to know

But you didn't have to cut me off
Make out like it never happened
And that we were nothing
And I don't even need your love
But you treat me like a stranger
And that feels so rough
No you didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records
And then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know

Somebody
I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
Somebody
I used to know
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
I used to know
That I used to know
I used to know
Somebody






The song says it all.The guilt inside me. If only I have the guts to do all the things that make me happy I would have been running to you long time ago, if only I'm that kind of person who thinks 'screw what you people want to think' but sadly I'm not that girl. Sadly for me, happy for them.


There's just something really soothing about this cover,love it.


Get out of my mind please...

6th LEAP YEAR.

The best leap year ever!Thanks Pos Malaysia for this DON 2 Limited Edition Shah Rukh Khan's collection,I am now a very proud owner.

1 year after our rendezvous,you still look suave as ever jaan ♥

"I Will Always Love You"

♥

Others call it coincident but I look at it as God's interference, the day world was shattered with the demise of such great singer (RIP Whitney Houston) I received such pleasant surprise, an email that meant a lot to me.More than words. Now, I know for sure I'll keep moving forwards but with each step I'll think about you dear.Bittersweet memories, that is all I'm taking with me.I hope life treats you kind, and I hope you have all you've dreamed of. And I wish to you, joy and happiness. But above all this, I wish you love.

Many nights we've prayed, with no proof anyone could hear but with now I know for sure He listens to every each prayer of ours.

I will always love you.Only Allah knows that.

The best cupcakes in town turns 2 years old today :)

From 1 Muslim to another :)

I have been spending quite some time recently with my childhood friends since I have the luxurious of free time in the last 2 months. For the past 5 years we rarely meet except for special occasions like Hari Raya or birthdays since everyone is busy with studying and considering the fact 2 of them are studying abroad make it more difficult. But when we meet I always had the best time of my life, laughing all the way talking about the same memories we shared during our schooling days (believe me,we laughed like bunch of maniac over THE SAME FREAKING stories!),what’s happening in our current life and how old we get now and each time we (more like me alone!) will be in denial. 1 of our hot topic is ‘kau selalu kena ejek time sekolah sebab tak join sekolah agama kan?’ The thing is my father thought we (my sister and I) will get tired attending 2 schools in the same day, some more with extracurricular activities, etc plus its highly important to state here that it is NOT compulsory under our country’s education system. It’s more like the parents’ choice for their children, to give them equal chance to excel in both worlds so that they will have choices later in pursuing in term of career wise. I always felt ashamed and had low self esteem every time other kids start to make fun of me for not going to sekolah agama because in the society's view by attending that school you are taught to be a better Muslim. Let me tell you its all crap! The fact is, its so opposite in the real life, especially talking about present time. Contrary to popular belief those who doesn’t attended the sekolah agama would definitely be someone social in his way of life, looking to the people who did went but acting like they don’t would make you want to say MasyaAllah everytime you see them these days.

Most of my good friends did attend and they shine in both schools, but none of them (as far as I know) trail to that path of further studies. Let me clear the fact that I have no qualm in confessing that the reason why I’m wearing hijab /tudung is not because I realised my duty as a Muslim but to be honest that is what my parents want me to do as they think it’s about time since I’ve reached the right age. I wasn’t forced nor given ultimatum instead they firmly reasoned me out, for sure I was rebelling inside but somehow I don’t feel it as an oppression neither, I clearly know this day will come it’s just a matter of time. I’ve been taught by amazing ustazah (s) since I was a kid, even they weren’t the type of people or educator who preach the teaching of ‘Kalau kau tak pakai tudung, kau orang jahat’ (If you don’t wear tudung you are a bad person) instead they were the one who instilled in myself that the image projects by a Muslim lady when she chooses to not to wear tudung is the matter of between her and the creator, as Allah is the only One has the right to judge his ummah. I was not raised in a family of alim ulama, to know how your religion works doesn’t make you pious people it’s just make you a responsible servant to God and wilfully follow the law written by Allah because we want that happiness in akhirat, because we believe in heaven and hell as well as we are followers of Prophet Muhammad S.A.W.

I was 18 when I started wearing it ‘professionally’ meaning to classes, going out with family, etc but when it comes to outdoor activities like my Taekwando class, playing futsal with friends, having fun at waterpark or anything that falls under that same category I will leave it behind without feeling any guilt (THEN). I grew up in a multimixracial-religion family and am surrounded by women who doesnt wear tudung and that doesn’t make them less saint to those who does, it’s just that the mix cultural and amalgamation of few races in our family makes that as a choice rather than a compulsory option. My own mother started wearing tudung only after given birth to my brother if I’m not mistaken, I was 7 and that makes her 37 years old. During their (our parents) time wearing clothes that can be consider kinda revealing now days for example the ladies not covering their hair, wearing miniskirts, etc was not such a big deal as a Muslim but as time goes by the practise of Islam in our country is roving to the right path and more civilised in the religion sense itself. The society used to put themselves as Malay first then only Muslim, but today it’s the other way around when they realised that’s the true teaching of the Al-Quran no matter what colour you are, what race or caste you belong too, what language you spoken, etc in the eyes of Allah all Muslims are the same. As years have passed by, at the age of 21 years old I start to feel that I don’t think I can be seen in public without my tudung anymore, somehow slowly naturally it planted firmly in myself that now it is part of your identity and not a choice you can make anymore and I feel happy knowing I’m now wearing it for Allah and not because I give a damn of what would people say behind my back nor for my parents solely. Before, I was a bit hesitant to wear it full time because I still be wearing short sleeve shirts, fit outfit, and etc but my father told me if you want to wear tudung wear it completely as it is not an accessory which just complement your fashion as a Muslim. I’m not saying am no more wearing fit jeans, etc but I gradually changing for the better I hope as my age grows and it is a conscious decision and not because of my father say so.

3 months ago when a new great friend of mine informing me her intention to learn how to wear tudung, and asked me for help I couldn’t be happier as a Muslim as well as a friend. We were in the midst of the chaos in preparing for our last final exam in University, when she told me that and her choice of words literally made my eyes teary. She said,’Cheda, entah kenapa I rasa terbuka hati nak pakai tudung lepas kawan dengan you.I x ada sangat kawan rapat yang pakai tudung, nanti you ajar I boleh? I rasa you lah role model terbaik boleh tolong I sekarang, I nak belajar pakai selendang macam you lepas habis final exam nanti.’ And I of course who was so excited for her, dump my Civil Procedure notes at that time and start browsing online to buy her first selendang. I taught her how to wear it on our last day in Melaka, using my forever rainbow-ish collection of selendang in my room witnessed by Sarah. All of us felt so grateful to be able to help our friend, Lulu is the friend I never thought I can be friending this close with. We know each other since first year but hit off really well only in our last 4 months of our student’s life thanks to mock trial which combined our 2 groups of colourful personalities and dramas. She is such a soft spoken, kind-hearted and so polite. I kept telling her that because she’s kinda too good to be true, and Fariz is such a lucky man to have her, hopefully they’ll end up together pretty soon. And since she’s from Ipoh I make a conclusion that orang Ipoh memang baik-baik because even Nisa has the same character. She took time to be comfortable before start wearing it full time who knows somewhere near in future. Baby step is more than enough compare to stand still and not thinking forward.Syukur Alhamdulillah.

Its true that every single things happen for a reason, we may not see it at first but along the journey He will show the sweetness of every choice and decision you made. For someone who at first started wearing tudung for her parents’ sake and now being someone who has inspired others to also wear it, I couldn’t ask for a bigger hikmah than this. Thank you Allah, pray that all of us will always be under His blessing and not to stray from this path, Amin.

Please protect us from evil Ya Allah, Amin...

24th January

I can still remember vividly the great things that happened in my 23rd January (last year). But now my 24th January has passed by like a bullet train in Japan, too fast that I don't have enough time to enjoy the 'ride'. I'm in a whole new phase, some of the faces diminished slowly, yet the memories stay where they belong dearly;in my heart that is. Working life take most of not just your time but also mentally and emotional strength, when you came back you just want to lay down doing nothing, not interested in talking to people, makan tidak mengikut waktu i.e suka-suki hati bila busy tak makan, sleep and more sleep. Oh man I can feel how old my body turning to.But I'm a fighter, therefore I still find time to do stuffs that make me happy.

I love looking how much happiness big family brings ♥ Thanks Sha for letting me share a tiny piece of that happy moment.

2012 Resolution: Do adventures outdoor stuff,in progress with our 1st was ATV ride in Kemensah. Cuak gak dowh jungle tracking ni,dah lama akak x join.hahaha.

The super funny CEO,Uncle Izham picked me to be his 'Get-To-Know-A-Follower-Day' and yeah he put so much misery!But I adore him so much :)

The doctor with smoking hot eyes re-tweeted me,I know I'm such a celebs stalker!Well I did warn you right the moment you requested to follow me,lol.haha.

I'm officially a registered GLEEK. My mission this year is to spread the petition for LIVE TOUR by Glee stars across ASIA especially Malaysia.

Foster The People live in KLCC, the coolest & most awesome-est gig EVER! Kinda pissed off why they were not given a bigger venue, when Bieber can get Stadium Negara why are these talented guys only get KL Live which can only accomodate 3000 people?Not fair at all!Booooooooooooooo..



Looking forward for more 'spices' in life ♥

The M word

'The most important career choice you'll make is who you marry'. -Sheryl Sandberg COO Facebook-

And suddenly that girl said;'But the best career decision is not to get married' and I just like give the weirdest smile ever because she reminds me to someone.I think that was me.

Such a turn on...........

Unexplainable things music does to your heart.I've been struck by..I've been hit by these 2 cellists.

PURE AWESOME-NESS!Great day ends with mind-blowing music,what more can I asked for,it feels like ages since I have the luxury of sitting back and enjoy..just chillax around.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Santana v Sebastian

People just can't question why one can be such a huge fan of Michael Jackson and GLEE like MYSELF especially after watching this.


Oh God, I think I have a girl crush on Naya Rivera a.k.a Santana!That husky beautiful voice,that LIMA HIGH attitude and the whole thing makes her character very 'likeable' is my favourite since 1st season.

I hope all Malaysian GLEEKs will sign up the petition for GLEE live tour in Asia,dying to watch them here!Ok I so want to learn how to play cello after watching this,awesome-ness!

Brittana ♥

Kafir

"In Islam, it doesn't matter which family you were born into (ie pious Muslim/non-Muslim family). BUT what matter most is how you die. Each of us are judged on what we know and we are only responsible based on WHAT WE KNOW". Allah will guide in many different ways. So dont simply go and brand people as Kafir. (so true!)". -Quoted from someone,its an usrah delivered by brother Shakirit,who is well-versed on comparative religion. He spoke about Misconception in Islam-

Iman.Amal.Takwa

The LEGEND ex-captain

Our ex-captain Gary Neville came to town,the one who dedicated his whole professional life in Manchester United. It was such an honour to be selected as 1 out of 10 lucky fans among thousands in the crowd for a meet&greet session with the Red Devils's legend himself.Most exciting part where I got to go on stage after a lucky draw selection and asked him a question but being too freaking nervous I told him how I love Man Utd and been watching him since I was 11,take picture (they didnt allowed us to use our own camera but the newspaper people take pictures for us) and have my jersey signed.Have to sacrificed one of my favourite jersey but its all worth it! The most shocking part was when he got down on 1 knee,for what?!Thank you Mr.Potato,next time please bring Solksjaer,Giggs or Scholes please? Back in July when Van Der Sar was here bringing the league championship trophy, I was in Melaka;Criminal Procedure class to be exact.We were so devastated when our friends sent picture with him from Menara TM so this time I just got to be here and I'm glad I did ♥

GGMU :)

Bismillahirramanirrahim.

Raihan - Dimulakan dengan Bismillah

Started this new chapter in my life with one short yet powerful word,'Bismillah' and at the end of the week I would like to end it by saying Thank You Allah and 'Alhamdulillah'.


1st week went pretty well,although the working hour is not 9am to 6pm (kena tipu time interview!) but the fact you only got to leave the office once your master leave, the fact you have to work on Saturday to finished submission for cases coming the coming week, the fact they can't pronounce my name correctly (damn cute!) and give me tons of new names while keep questioning whether I'm a Malay, the fact that I'm the only Muslim, the fact that there's not even 1 halal restaurants in that area, and the fact that I'm feeling so intimidated with how the real legal world works; I'm having a good time learning new stuffs. Looking forward for another 268 days. But I am not complaining, don't deserve to because so far I'm so blessed and grateful to have such nice and wonderful colleagues and also lawyers who are willing to guide me through this journey. And my chambee-mate, couldn't ask for a nicer person.For someone who studied in UK and is one of the partner's daughter, she's really down to earth and helpful.


Yeah,I keep whining how tired I am at the end of each day but as time goes by I hope I'll stop doing so.I'll try my best. The keyword is TRY.Don't put so much hope. Can't imagine how our mothers can be up as early as 4.30am, do house chores and prepare breakfast for us, leaving for work at 6.45 and only come back at 6pm then still able to prepare mouth watering home cooked meal for dinner and the list goes on. Mothers are truly superhuman, so much respect for them man. I can never do that, when I'm tired I don't feel the need to eat but sleep is all I can think of so just imagine if I were to be a mother, poor kid as I bet the children have to sleep with empty stomach.hahahaha.

High Court is the hugest 'playground' with so many rules,kinda hate it already!Still be going there again and again.

Still keeping all my Raihan's cassettes since their 1st album:)

McFreak

'No matter how much of a freak you end up being, chances are there's still someone out there for you. Unless of course, they've already moved on'. -Grey's Anatomy.

All this hiatus thingy for USA TV shows is killing me, I need my dose of drama.


Missing my Glee,Csi(s),The Good Wife,Happy Endings,The Big Bang Theory,Switched At Birth, and obviously Grey's Anatomy!

TV is my mini cinema:)

Hate it but live with it.

Hate how they act foolishly just to attract attention,unnecessarily.
Hate how they faking their accent.
Hate how they bitching about others as if its a cool thing to do.
Hate how they think they know you.
Hate how they make you feel they are the real friends.
Hate how they insincerely stick by your side when I'm not around.
Hate how they think its fun to humiliate a girl publicly.
Hate how they think hurting a girl physically is fun to do.
Hate how they think they know the real story.
Hate how they judge me when I don't even know them.
Hate how they judge me when I never even talk to them.

Hate how they look at me and rolling they eyes to show protest for NO reason.

Hate how they .................................................and then I stop because all other reasons are just

because................I simply,

Hate how they change you.

I love my life!